Sequence

She was looking out the window, observing the emerald grass and the blowing trees. (I was looking at HER, observing her perfect cheeks and shiny tendrils).

Sequence 1

Then, she saw something...or, rather, someone.

Sequence 2

It was her big sister! Those two love each other like crazy (and they totally know how to make each other laugh too).

Sequence 3

*** Today, my friend Dayna and her two little girls came over. We discussed sibling relationships and how we long for our kids to be close friends...the best of friends even. And we wondered aloud: how do you foster that?

WHAT DO YOU THINK? Are you best friends with your sibling(s)? How do you think your parents contributed to your friendship (or lack thereof)?

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23 comments on “Sequence”

  1. My oldest daughters (18 years and 16 years) are best friends. They share a room and talk about everything. This relationship didn't start until this year, and now they are truly the greatest of friends.

    My youngest daughters (3 years and 2 years) love each other the same way. They laugh, play, cuddle and worry about one another.

    The relationship between the sisters is so amazing. I feel blessed getting to watch the different ages, and how similar they are.

  2. I just love how much your girls love each other. It makes me smile so much. Every once in a while we think about not having more kids but I can'r imagine life without my sisters and want that for Lily.

  3. My only sister is 10 years older than me. We had an older brother, but he has passed away. I don't know
    what I would do without my sister, who is my best friend.....Thanks, Cindi

  4. Look at the love on their faces! My son & our next (due in June) will hopefully be friends but they'll be 5 years apart so it might not be until later in life. My brother and I fought all the time when we were little but my parents always told us that we needed to be friends because family will always be there for you - now we are great friends.

  5. What beautiful pictures! How thrilling that camera was "in hand":) I have the book set aside for you- hopefully you will get through it before I can. It is called "Making Brothers and Sisters Best Friends." Anybody read it? Let's make a date for when I get back in town.
    Had a GREAT time, friend. You are an amazing mommy.
    I'm still chuckling about Jo's "bookhouse" that the big girls built :)

  6. Adorable pictures!

    My sister and I are 23 months apart. We were close when we were very young, then grew apart starting in the later elementary school years. We're two very different people and that sometimes caused a rift growing up. We did take a ton of family vacations and always had dinner together as a family. We also went to each other's sporting events, piano recitals, etc. I think part of sibling closeness is out of a parent's control. My mom and I recently had a conversation about why my sister and I were not the best of friends. She blames herself (I don't blame her though) but she did say that looking back, she wishes she would have backed off more on trying so hard to make us close and let our sisterly bond evolve naturally. She was always quick to stop a fight and now she wishes that she would have let us work things out ourselves.

    However, now things are really good between my sister. She just got engaged and I was the first person she told (even before our parents!) and I will be the matron of honor and help out in the wedding planning. So to all moms who have children that don't seem to "click", keep the faith!

  7. I'm an only child so I can't answer for myself but I love to watch the relationship between my kids grow. Even when they're whining at each other and complaining. It's amazing.

  8. My sis and I are super close! We had our share of arguments growing up (all her fault, of course), but really we've always been close.
    Amazing sliding-glass door picture, by the way :)
    I absolutely LOVE watching my kids interact... such a special connection!

  9. Your pictures are just perfect. My kids are 26 months apart, they just recently started playing well together. It is still hard to explain about sharing... My preschooler loves acting as an old sister, she teaches the little one what to do, feeds her from a spoon, takes her on a walk by hand... they are fun to be watch

  10. Oh, that picture just made me so very happy!

    I am 25 months older than my sister. And my tinies are also 25 months apart (to the same day, if you can believe it). My sister is my very best friend and we could not be more different. When we were little, my mother kept our circle small (she was a simple living precursor, I'm convinced) so that we always played together. We shared a room. The biggest thing was that she always told us we were best friends - and we believed her! As we got older, we became our own tribe. We were even roommates in university. Despite how different we are, no one gets our jokes like we do or has the same memories we do. We do life together, building a common history.

    I think that your girls will be that way. It's in the dailyness, really. It is special though.

    There is something about sisters.

  11. These are such wonderful photos! My sister and I are 4 years apart, and my brother is 3 years younger than my sister. As far as my sister and I are concerned, we've gone through stages where we were incredibly close, and then stages where we had almost nothing in common, or stages where we really did not get along well at all. This was true as children, and still true today as adults (although the not-getting-along-stage is not nearly as dramatic as when we were children!)

    I think a lot of it has to do with different stages in a child's development being reached at different times, causing a temporary rift. I grew out of playing with Barbies long before she did, just because I was four years older. She hit the difficult teenage years as I was growing out of them. Now, as adults, we're very close, and get together at least once a week with our children, and about once a month without the kids. I think that ebb and flow in sibling relationships is natural...not simple or smooth or easy, of course, but natural.

  12. Adorable pictures of your girls!
    I am close to my siblings. We are all girls. I'm not sure my parents did anything on purpose to foster our relationships with each other. We did have a lot of fun family vacations (usually driving long distances in the car--so lots of car time together) and family day trips. We were always laughing together. We always had dinner together. We couldn't watch any TV, so that forced us to play creatively together--usually outside, and we just really had a blast growing up together. We were left to play on our own a lot (not neglected in any way--just kind of 'the kids do their thing and the parents do theirs,' etc.), and my older sister definitely took the protective role and "watched out" for us. I remember she just about beat up a much bigger boy for calling me 'spaghetti legs' once. I was probably six at the time. It still makes me laugh. :-) I live far away from both of my sisters now, but I still consider them my best friends.
    I too would love nothing more than for my children to absolutely adore each other and be the best of friends. Very nice post, Stephanie.

  13. We talked about this in my Early Childhood class the other day. Our instructor encouraged us not to interfere with every little squabble the siblings might have. Apparently letting them work out disagreements when they are young (not BULLYING though, which is different) correlates with less sibling rivalry and a stronger bond when they are older.

    I loved your pictures because they are EXACTLY how my little Lucy would react to the sight of her big brother too. There's something about seeing someone familiar on the other side of a window pane that causes much excitement.

    You little lady is definitely getting some curls isn't she? SO CUTE!

  14. I only have brothers and we're closer now than we were when we were kids but not best friend by far. If I had a sister, I think we'd be very close. My girls are Wonderful friends (most of the time) and I'm so glad for that.

  15. What a great sequence of pictures! My sister and I did not get along as we grew up. We are 18 months apart and I'm not sure if that had anything to do with it. I think as babies/little kids we got along but then not for a long time. The day I moved out to go to college though, we became good friends. We've been best friends since then. I have 2 kids and they fight a lot. But there are so many times where they do play together and treat each other so well. I'm not sure how you help them remain close and best friends. But I think in the end if you try to foster a good relationship then they will become best friends (even if it's not until they are older).

  16. At one time, my brother and I were best friends. Then we weren't, and now we're back to being close. It'd be so wonderful to just tell them "you are best friends, forever!" and have it be so, but it's never that easy. I don't have an answer, except to make them aware of how special it is to have a sibling, and how much love it brings.

  17. I love, love, love that your girls are such great friends. It brings me so much joy watching my two little ones love on each other and become better friends every day.

    I am the youngest of six kids...my sister being the oldest, then four boys, then me. We were sort of paired off while I was growing up so my brother, who is just 12 months older than me, and I were very close. As we got older, we drifted a bit. I have chosen to live my life much differently than the rest of my family which naturally leads to different morals, ideals, values, and the things we have in common. However, as we have gotten older we have all gotten closer again and in order to not repeat some of the things my parents did, we (my siblings and I) have made a big effort to be more family oriented and to be involved with one another and our growing families.

  18. What an absolute perfect picture of your girls together through the glass.

    My older sister sister and I were really close growing up, and then grew apart for a bit. Now, we have become very close again as we've aged.

    I've never really thought of my parents contributing (or lack thereof) our relationship. However, I am doing my best to foster a healthy friendship in my girls.

  19. my sister is one of my closest friends BUT there is still a lot of competition between the two of us. We are completely different - She's blond, I'm brunette. She's a jock I was artsy. She has 100's of "close" friends. I have only a couple "close" friends and a lot of people I'm friendly with. But, in the end I talk to her several times a week, we bond over our mom getting old, we cheer one another on in our ventures and we're always there for a shoulder to cry on.

    Our parents contributed to this friendship by family dinners, supporting one another in our activities (she never missed a dance concert and I never missed a volleyball game) and our family always had fun together.

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