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Book Review: Babyproofing Your Marriage

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Babyproofing Your Marriage“It’s been said that having a baby is like throwing a hand grenade into a marriage. A hand grenade? Why the violent methaphor for such a precious, peaceful thing? They’re so beautiful. How could anyone defame such a cutie? But it’s true. Those babies just explode right into our hearts and lives.”

I love that paragraph from Babyproofing Your Marriage: How to Laugh More, Argue Less, and Communicate Better as Your Family Grows (HarperCollins, 2007) by Stacie Cockrell, Cathy O’Neill, and Julia Stone. I like it because it’s accurate.

The authors go on to say that “…most couples, no matter how happy and secure their marriage may be, find the early parenting years a challenge…” They then offer humorous and sobering stories, tips and ideas, and encouragements to help readers build and maintain intimacy in their marriages during the newborn stage and beyond. The three women do an excellent job of telling-it-like-it-is and of speaking to both “sides.” They discuss issues that all of us face – from sex to household chores to free time to financial worries. New parents are bound to read plenty of scenarios within the book’s page that will sound familiar – perhaps a little too familiar.

Although I think there are a few points in the book where bad advice is proffered up (ex. check page 238), I still sincerely recommend this book to parents-to-be and new parents. The book has much to offer – and, at very minimum, will likely spark some great conversations between you and your spouse.

WIN IT! One winner will receive Babyproofing Your Marriage: How to Laugh More, Argue Less, and Communicate Better As Your Family Grows by Stacie Cockrell, Cathy O’Neill, and Julia Stone. To enter, simply leave a comment on this post prior to Saturday, April 12 at midnight (don’t forget to follow the rules). The winner will be announced and contacted on Sunday, April 13. * Winner must provide a U.S. mailing address.

*UPDATE* The winner is #91 Helen Vassilakis. Congratulations!

Comments

  5. I’ll take all the help I can get. Thanks for the opportunity to participate.

  8. I think there are a few points in the book where bad advice is proffered up.

  11. This book sounds like a marvelous insurance policy at preserving/saving a marriage. How FANTASTIC. Lets be proactive and less reactive. Best of luck to all who enter!!! Thank You!!! SW

  14. If I won this, there are about a dozen couples who I’d pass this along to afterwards. :)

  17. Please enter me in your giveaway. My brother and sister-in-law NEED this book desperately! Thank you for the giveaway.

  18. This is such a timely review since hubby and I were just discussing what having #3 will do to our relationship since we will be outnumbered! But we also made plans to “keep the fire” going by scheduling dates, reading the Word together more often and things like that. :)

  32. really need a teenager marriage proofing book, but this would make a great gift book!

  34. I would love to win this book for my daughter and her husband. They have two boys Tyler 2 yrs. and Lane 5 months. They do have problems trying to balance everything. This book would help out alot.

  38. OK, I am currently pregnant AND getting married this June. This book would be PERFECT to receive before both of those events occur. Thanks for the chance to win one!

  41. Gosh-this is JUST the book I have been needing. I have a five year old with my husband and a 10 year old from a previous marriage. We are having major trouble-stemming with parenting issues. This sounds perfect!!

  44. I think that my relationship with my husband has improved, rather than been stressed, since we adopted our daughter. I think the biggest challenge on our relationship with going through infertility, so maybe after that it was bound to get better.

    I’d love to read this book because I’m sure we have a lot to learn. And now that we’ve decided to adopt again, life will probably only get more challenging.

  47. From your review this seems like a very interesting book. I’d love to read it.

  48. I would love to have a copy of this book. Although my children are 10 and 13, my (new) husband has never had children, and we ALL are having a hard time adjusting. This might be just what we need.

  49. My son and daughter-ini-law are expecting their first. This would be great for them.

  52. One could never have prepared me for how much a child would change our marriage–even after 14 years.

    This book no doubt has some great points of communication…

    Thanks for the chance!

  53. I can’t communicate with my fiancee now, so I NEED this book for our future!!! LOL! Thanks for a great offer!

  54. My friend is just about to have her very first baby with her husband. I think these books would help them out immensley.

  56. Now that we have 2 around I’ve been wondering about 2 things in particular 1. How in the world do you find time to read the Bible daily and 2. How in the world do you find time (and energy!) to have sex. Mostly I find these hard to do b/c it seems that one is always awake. I’m going to have to hunt down this book and somehow find time to read it. Maybe just in small spurts when I’m in the bathroom.

  57. We have 5 kids and have found all of the early parenting years a challenge. and I can’t beleive how forgetful we can be. You’d think by the 5th child we would remember at what month we started solids.

  58. I would love to win this book – my sister is expecting her first and this would be a great gift to her and her husband.

  60. I need this! My hubby and I were just talking about this the other day. We’ve got to remember what life was like BEFORE children!

  65. My husband and I are trying to get pregnant and as new parents could use the advice from experts about the big change coming our way!

    tigerjennv at yahoo dot com

  66. My husband & I have just been talking recently about how much we want to start having a regular “date night” again. I would love some creative ideas.

  67. My stepdaughter had a baby last year and this sounds like something she could use to get through the rough times. Thank you for the contest!

  73. Cute and catchy title for a book!

    I also like The Five Love Languages. It sounds like Babyproofing has a similar theme. It’s all about how to express love to your mate in the way that he/she needs (as opposed to way you think he/she needs because we tend to do whatever we, ourselves would want) in the busyness of life. There is also a second book called The Five Love Languages of Children although I have not read this one yet.

    Thanks for the chance to win!

  75. We’ve decided to read books together and this one would be great for my husband and I!

  84. I think this book could be very helpful to me.
    My husband and I don’t really see each other these days and I’m always busy with our boys. Thanks for the great giveaway.

  85. indeed, we have 3 grenades that have exploded in 5 years. Our lives can be chaotic, but we wouldn’t trade it for anything. We just take it one day at a time–and with humor. It sounds like an encouraging book–we could use that!

  86. SOooo need this book… may get it if I don’t win it!! Please enter me for this contest! Em

    (emandmikeyATaolDOTcom)

  87. Okay. I totally need to read this book. We were somewhat unphased with the introduction of our daughter, but throwing a 2nd baby into the mix in the last 4 months has made our life, marriage, and everything a real balancing act. We could definitely use some advice!

  88. Maybe this is what I should have read before I had my daughter. Maybe it will better prepare me for things to come.

  89. This seems to be a great book. I have been hesitant to start trying for children because I am unsure how it will affect my husband and I’s relationship.

  90. This sounds like a great read! While I’m not married, my partner and I have certainly found having a new baby in our lives….different. It sounds like a book that could really be helpful for new parents, married or not!

    Thanks for posting this contest! I’ve also subscribed to your blog, because I love finding new mommy-blogs!

    eternally at gmail dot com

  91. my husband left me in 2003 because he said i paid more attention to our baby than i did to him. uhhhh..hello! the child couldn’t do anything for himself. in time (and another marriage gone bad for him due to a new kid) he’s seen the error of HIS ways. now my brother and his wife are about to have their first baby – and i so desperately want them to NOT have the problems we did. this would be a great read for the two of them! thanks for the opportunity to win it. christwil@gmail.com

  92. Adding an addition to the family sure does change things. I didn’t realize how much would change until the first one arrived.

  94. We have number 3 on the way- and I know our system will need some help!! Having a great relationship with the person you are in the ‘family’ with is essential for a happy, healthy set of children. I would love the opportunity to find more tools to ensure our relationship doesn’t hit major bumps with the addition of the third child!

  96. We would love to babyproof our marriage. I love your point about our kids wanting us to make our marriage a priority too…….I believe that is so true. They do NEED to feel secure!

  98. I always appreciate books that focus on marriage. I learned so much about that during my undergraduate coursework and I still need a reminder sometimes!

  103. While hubby and I do quite well (in my humble opinion), we could always do better, learn more, and grow closer together. Thanks for this weekend’s theme! gumbi1313 at msn dot com

  106. Happy Sunday! What an amazing sounding book! My husband and I could benefit from its’ wisdom! Not only does a marriage need baby proofing, but child proofing. My opinion, of course. I know that my husband and I dote on our two sons and forget about ourselves way too much. Please enter me in your drawing. Thanks,Cindi

  109. Our little kids did bring a certain explosion into our lives! But it was the best grenade EVER! I’d LOVE to read the book :)

  112. With 3 kids in the house ranging from 10 years to 9 months, there’s not a lot of time for us parents. I would love to win this book so I can learn more how this could work better. Thanks for the great give away, I really hope I win.

  113. This book is even better than I expected…it’s as if these authors live in my home!!! Great suggestions that have made my husband and I appreciate each other more. I recommend this book to anyone who is struggling with maintaining a closeness with their spouse when the house and childcaring seems to always take center stage.

  115. I wish I would’ve read this book before the baby arrived. The first couple months were the hardest, especially since I was breastfeeding and hubby is gone ~14 hrs of the day. Things are slowly getting better as my son gets more independent. I’d still really like to read the book. I’m sure there’s some good tips I could still use!

  117. We are expecting our first in June, so I think this book would be great to read before the baby arrives! Thanks.

  126. Hmmm… Maybe I should’a got this book before we got married – oh, wait! By then Livia was already ‘on the way!’ Oh, this looks like a really great read. I absolutely LOVE reading, and lately the best stuff I’ve read in print are photography magazines & Readers Digests. ALL my favorite reads are in blogger-world now! I’ve learned more in these few short months of reading others’ blogs than I have in all 4 years in college – just kidding! But seriously, I do love learning and reading from others.

    Thank you SO MUCH for yet another awesome giveaway, and thanks also for letting me participate! Much love to you & yours, take care and God Bless!

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