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You are here: Home / Miscellany / Distracted {A Note to My Friends}

Distracted {A Note to My Friends}

May 14, 2009 By Stephanie

Do I seem a little distracted when I talk to you?

Do I have a hurried way about me when you see me at church or bump into me at the grocery story?

Do I seem like my mind is somewhere else when you call me on the phone?

I’m sorry. Really. I want to know all about what is on your mind. I want to listen, to really listen. I want to call you at a moment’s notice to go out for coffee or to go running, to catch my breath from this chaos.

But I’m in this certain season of life that requires me to be a bit “internal-focused.”

Sometimes I don’t like making bowls of cheerios and painting with watercolors and making “sticker crafts” and doing the choo-choo train and holding a baby 24/7.

But mostly I do.

Mostly, I know that these menial tasks are shaping my daughters’ hearts. I know that I wouldn’t have it any other way.

So, yes, I am a little distracted. I can’t just drop everything and go (because that “everything” means the world to me).

I hope you’ll forgive me for that.

I hope you’ll still call and e-mail and comment on my daily doings on Facebook and invite me to fun functions. Because I do think about you. I do care.

I’m just a little bit distracted by the two little girls that fill up my heart:

85-weeks-old-11 photo-4-copy1

Filed Under: Miscellany

Comments

  1. Cheryl Ensom Dack says

    August 28, 2010 at 8:52 pm

    thought you might understand/get/appreciate this post from another distracted Mama :) http://roseyposeyconfections.blogspot.com/2008/05/some-thoughts-on-mothers.html

  2. Aimee Pickett says

    April 19, 2010 at 10:00 pm

    Awww! Children are the worlds best “distractions”! Most of my friends are parent’s and I have never felt neglected by them, I know they are very busy and..well, just as you say, distracted. That would be a good feeling and I know someday Jeremy and I will have our own little distraction and it will be wonderful!

  3. marianne macleod says

    October 16, 2009 at 7:15 am

    Thank you for sharing your heart so sweetly about being “distracted”. I can so much relate. Being a Pastors wife with 4 children of my own I feel very distracted and pulled in many directions. I want to cut and paste your words and put it over the door of my home…. so kindly spoken. <3

  4. Erin S. says

    June 1, 2009 at 9:44 am

    thank you. i think i dhould copy this and send it to some friends that have slowly gotten distant. (as i type with one hand because i’m feeding my 6 month old)

  5. Liz says

    May 20, 2009 at 10:24 pm

    You have a beautiful heart! I’m sure your friends understand the conflict. I feel the same way about myself. I am distracted a lot, but I wouldn’t have it any other way!

  6. Rhonda says

    May 17, 2009 at 12:35 pm

    Well put, it will go by so quickly and we don’t want to miss a thing.

  7. Heather says

    May 16, 2009 at 7:37 am

    beautifully and honestly stated… i often feel the same way. i wouldn’t trade anything for the time i get to spend with my boys : )

  8. erica says

    May 15, 2009 at 9:39 pm

    You haven’t seemed anything but lovely when I see you. If anything, I feel like I’ve been the distracted one! So enjoy the time you have in this stage, and don’t worry too much about the rest of us. We love you and know what is important to you, and that makes you even more special. :)

  9. Amy @Feasibly Fit Mom says

    May 15, 2009 at 8:35 pm

    I love your honest words and it sounds like you are being present in each moment with your girls. I agree: It’s nice to be included, and invited and called, but it’s not always the first thing on my mind these days either.

  10. Sarah T. says

    May 15, 2009 at 2:51 pm

    How beautifully put, Stephanie. I think all mommies can identify with that longing to still be part of our friends lives, to stay connected, and yet knowing that this is season of life when our babies need us most and there’s nothing more important we could be investing our time in. What a continual balancing act motherhood is!

  11. Jenny N. says

    May 15, 2009 at 2:19 pm

    This is SO great! I’m the first in my girlfriend circle to have kids so sometimes it’s very difficult for them to understand that “yes, I want to, but no I can’t.” I still want to be invited, but I might not be able to make it.

    Tonight I have a girls night and I had to let them know I can only make it for dinner. No pre-dinner cocktails and definitely no post-dinner drinks. Just dinner and I’m back to my baby for her feedings. It’s a hard place to be but yet I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.

    PS…I love the first picture of your daughter. Our daughter loves to be held that way too.

  12. Jacque Dixon says

    May 15, 2009 at 12:51 pm

    Been commenting on your laptop giveaway post. Saw this today. Beautiful message. I agree there are so many seasons in our lives. I think many of them include us as moms “to be a bit “internal-focused.””. Very well-put.
    May God bless you for that.

    Love the photos. They are darlings.
    blessings~

  13. Sarah says

    May 15, 2009 at 12:12 pm

    So well put! I feel this way all the time, too – and haven’t been able to put it to words. Enjoy being wrapped up in your wonderful, small world right now!

  14. Damselfly says

    May 15, 2009 at 12:07 pm

    I love this, friend! Enjoy being distracted.

  15. workout mommy says

    May 15, 2009 at 11:50 am

    perfect! I can completely relate.

    and honestly,I get annoyed sometimes by the people who will call and want to chat. My time is not my own anymore, I can’t just chat on the phone (for more than 60 seconds) before all hell breaks loose in my house!!

    these days, I don’t even answer the phone.

  16. Madeline says

    May 15, 2009 at 10:55 am

    I think all mommas feel the need to write that note at some time or other! I sure hope my friends forgive me.

  17. Michelle Smiles says

    May 15, 2009 at 9:59 am

    I feel so self absorbed right now but I feel unable (or unwilling) to change it. I keep telling myself this is a short period in my life and I hope everyone forgives me my inability to focus on things outside of my own home very well!

  18. Darcie-Such The Spot says

    May 15, 2009 at 9:39 am

    I love it when you post from your heart. And you’re not alone in this “season.” You’d be amazed how long a season it is by the way. Keep doing what you’re doing.

  19. Kris J says

    May 15, 2009 at 8:15 am

    What a perfect apology. Though it should be unneeded.

    You are truly right where you need to be.

  20. Jinxy says

    May 15, 2009 at 7:35 am

    I love this post (as with your blog really)!

    I feel exactly the same way. I want to do things with other adults but I have a more then full-time job that comes first to everything and everyone. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

  21. Summer says

    May 15, 2009 at 7:19 am

    You said it perfectly!

  22. Naomi says

    May 15, 2009 at 7:02 am

    I can’t think of a better reason to be ignored…

  23. Ashly says

    May 15, 2009 at 6:55 am

    I agree with the others, your heart is where it should be. I hope others aren’t giving you trouble for it — I don’t know anyone who ever looked back on life and said, “I wish I hadn’t spent so much time with my kids…”

    You’ll never regret it.

  24. Clara says

    May 15, 2009 at 6:50 am

    I can relate. Sometimes I wish I could get up and go do something I want to do at a moment’s notice. Or talk on the phone for an hour. But I can’t. And most of the time, I don’t want to. Sure, I get out every now and then to have some “mom” time. But mostly, I want to be there for my kids.

    • Amel says

      May 25, 2012 at 10:09 am

      Dear:marina
      I like to tell you that don’t be sad about what happen to day
      and I am really sorry

  25. Caryn B says

    May 15, 2009 at 6:17 am

    I am with you…sooo with you…..You expressed it perfectly! (as always!) hehe

  26. Erin --It's Your Movie-- says

    May 15, 2009 at 5:19 am

    Well said. And I feel exactly the same way. It’s hard but it’s where I want to be.

  27. Brie Tonk says

    May 14, 2009 at 10:48 pm

    I love this too, Stephanie. It’s exactly how I feel. I think that many people don’t get it unless they are in the middle of it. I have so many people that I SHOULD call or email or write. I have thank you notes half done that SHOULD have been delivered a month ago. I have new family pictures that I SHOULD have mailed weeks ago. I have so much to do that just doesn’t seem to get done, but tomorrow morning I get to take my 5 year old to kindergarten and stay for community time. Tomorrow I get to take my 2 year old to Springs in Rita Ranch for open gym (which I highly recommend, by the way) and thoroughly enjoy the sheer joy in his eyes as he bounces his way across the gym. And tomorrow I will sit and stare into my 7 week old baby’s big beautiful blue eyes while she coos and gives me sweet half smiles. Life is good and I will do my best to get to whatever it is that I need to get to when I can. We are blessed.

  28. Amber C says

    May 14, 2009 at 9:36 pm

    I love this. Its an interesting transition phase of motherhood that no one really tells you about. You still want to have all these interesting interactions with your friends but you realize that these pieces of your heart that are walking around and googling at you have created a world in which they are your center. The balance shifts for a time as it should. Enjoy it – they grow so fast.

  29. Blessed says

    May 14, 2009 at 9:18 pm

    I think I need to write a similar note to my friends… :)

  30. Shanna says

    May 14, 2009 at 9:17 pm

    Your heart is right where it should be. How wonderful.

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